Overwhelmed – deeply affected, moved, or hurt emotionally
This word describes my emotions since last night.
After I published my most recent blog post late Tuesday afternoon, I shut down my laptop, prayed that God would do with the words what He would, and then went on about my evening with the kids. Ray Don was out of town, so this included indulging in having someone else cook dinner for us (aka – eat out night)! As I sat at dinner with my kids, laughing at the humor only a 14 year old boy can possess, my phone started “dinging.” My phone doesn’t ding. Or at least I didn’t think it did.
It was some kind of an alert that I had never seen before. WordPress was alerting me to an “unusually high volume” on my blog. What does that even mean? Obviously, that was a new one for me.
We finished up dinner and shortly after we arrived home, my phone made the familiar sound of an incoming text message. Then another. Then an alert that I had a Facebook message. Then another.
As I began reading messages and started to digest what was happening, I was overcome with burden. Just this complete burden…and sadness.
I immediately called my husband. As soon as he answered I told him I needed him to pray for me. Right then. And to join me in also praying for you.
You see, my heart was broken. Broken for the unfortunate reality that I was right. I was right in knowing I wasn’t alone in the way I was feeling. But I had no idea. No idea at all just how broken the ugly parts of the world had made us women feel. I asked him to pray that the Lord would use my simple, imperfect words to bring healing to even just one person. I needed him to pray that the Lord use my little ol’ blog to help be soothing balm to someone’s hurting heart.
Shortly after that conversation, one of the messages I received was from a very dear and BEAUTIFUL friend I have not seen in many years. It was hard reading the unkind words she had to say toward herself in her message. I just wept. And wept. Then prayed again.
The reality of this battle can feel daunting, but not impossible. If we come together on bended knees and with bowed heads, we will be in the perfect position to begin battle. I know I have been tired and beat down for way too long. I have been choosing this path. I have been choosing to believe the enemy’s lies. And according to what I have seen in the last twenty-four hours, there are many, many more that feel just like me.
Tonight I am choosing to say, I am a beautiful creation! I am not a mistake. My God does not make mistakes! And, I am worthy because of a Savior that loves me!
We have to counteract the enemy’s lies by doing exactly what the Apostle Paul wrote almost 2,000 years ago:
“…whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things.” ~ Philippians 4:8
As I let these familiar words sink in, it is important to me that I remember where Paul was when he wrote these words. He was in a Roman prison. He was in shackles. But…He chose to cling to his Savior’s promises.
Ladies, we will choose this, too!
How? We surround ourselves with Truth! We will speak that Truth into the lives of the women around us, and maybe even more importantly, into ourselves! We need to let loose the shackles that bind us. Break free from the self-imposed prisons we have often put ourselves in.
Tonight, I am praying with a renewed purpose!
I am praying for the hearts of women to be turned back to the Lord and away from anything, and I mean anything, that would distract us from focusing on who we are in Him! I am praying for complete healing in our torn up hearts and minds when it comes to how we see ourselves. I am praying for women that don’t yet know the Lord to come to Him quickly so they may fully understand their inheritance in Him! I am praying that I and my sisters in Christ will rise up, claim our place as daughters of the King, and in turn be empowered to speak BOLDLY into the lives of other women.
And please, continue to speak those life giving words especially to yourself!
You are beautiful! You are worthy!
Let’s be the catalyst for change!